Does it ever feel like reality is punishing you? Or like you are cursed?

Nice agenda youre trying to push there schlomo

What agenda would that be?

Find a job -> get money -> spend money

Is it so hard in Gaymerica?

I normally wouldn't but I am very desperate I have nothing to lose in being hurt.

That wouldn't be God blessing me it would be Satan. I don't want to be evil if I didn't care at all about God I would end my life.

you have to realize that it's not your fault for being depressed. Humanity lived 99% of it's history as hunter gatherers and you are now thrown in this unnatural world with technology beyond comprehension. By design you feel stressed and because of conditioning (school,media,entertainment) the system keeps you invested and manipulates you for the ultimate goal of "progress"

Yeah that's something I've considered German anon. Abandoning all of society to be a monk in the woods.

Its been nice camping but this requires money and eventually I would need to buy some land. Not sure if I have the energy left to buy a nice plot of land and a cabin. It would take me at least 5 years of waging and I doubt I can even do one in my broken spirits.

Kike businesses don't accept homeless people working for them, they will find out it's hilarious how they bash homeless for non-working then telling them they won't hire them cause they're homeless hahahah I fucking hate america

They don't let you live in the woods here you can stay max 3 weeks before you gotta move elsewhere. Only long term option is buying some land

I'm blessed with two perfect white sons but cursed with being old and skilless and no connections. Before I had kids I always worked basic jobs as a high school dropout but got by being a hard worker. Now I no longer get promotions based on my hard work and am not looked at as a prospect. It's pretty bad. I'm pretty close to becoming a criminal unironically to get my family out of the ghetto. Also gettin skin cancers on face suddenly.

So anon can we have a mailing address for "reasons"... Ummm I don't have one.

(never hear back from them)

You’re getting gangstalked. Moving out of the country is your only solution. Protip move to a country that doesnt like yours.

That guy you replied to is jewish

This jewish country is a very very bad place, yes

Anon here's what your going to do, you need to move to Colorado,they have homeless services that will boost you on your feet easily, you have nothing to lose if your living in a car at this point , find craiglist odd jobs on the way state to state to snag gas money make sure to get insurance premiums paid early and make sure your documents are all good get ready to set up a PO box and mail forward so you don't miss shit, homeless services can give you an address to reregister your car and and redo insurance you get like 90 days to do this too plenty of. Time, You gotta move quick or be dead DONT LOOK HOMELESS, organize your car to be tidy, use the trunk to hide your sleeping stuff, godspeed to you anon be sure to get Visible btw for phone service it's prepaid 25$ a month,

I've suspected it anon. Weird people have just been showing up at places and I recognize them.

I did go to another state for camping the last month or 2 so maybe things will get better. I do wonder sometimes if my food or water was poisoned.

You are such a whiny faggot

Pain is necessary. That's how karmic debt is paid off.

modern unnatural world

Everything is natural. Earth is hell or heaven depending on your circumstance. In the present. In the past.

Honestly try travelling to Cambodia save money as an esp teacher if you have nothing going for you and buy some condo or commercial unit assets there

And if all else fails just try the three hots and a cot method anything to out-jew the system

Cuz you’re white an deserve to suffer for racism

I'm all the way out in Texas not sure I could make it that far but I'll consider it. Does Colorado have a decent economy?

That sucks that you have skin cancer on your face.

I'd consider it if my health was better and I had a bit more money. Seems like a good place to go when you have 10 grand+

everyday

Depends on your field oh and don't forget
Greyhounds like 100$ if you plan a month out Some banks can let you change your address on the system to anything to print out a statement and there you go proof of address, the state has good economy and lots of towns that are VERY cheap (but high theft!) Public transits bearable in some places , theres plenty of options to go about this but the choice is yours, always keep up on your paperwork and mail so you don't slip in the cracks of homelessness further

yeah

lol this nigga got redpilled by fucking mold spores

kek, put me in the screencap

acne

Took med that gave me permanent ED

Brain fog and anxiety

Pretty sure I know what happened and I'll lie to you and tell you it gets better

Yeah. I don't want to believe I'm cursed but all the evidence points to the contrary. The only thing I'm a victim of is my own poor choices, however.

I didn't take the covid shot. Also never heard of anyone getting this from one pharma drug.

The acne was pretty random unless if it was the mold. This all happened in order too like one by one these things happened. Maybe they gave me the shot secretly somehow?

It applies to pharma in general
You took Accutane or an SSRI?

Yeah I guess that's my bad. But still never heard of anyone I know dozens of people who take pharma drugs like candy and they never had anything like this happen.

But I should have known better for me I will never go to the doctors again

Yes all the time

The weirdest thing is I took this drug in the past no such thing occured. I don't even know if it was the drug but its the only thing that correlates.

Which drug?
Accutane or SSRI?

SSRI

I caught 2 stalkers on a hidden camera who were breaking into my house and putting shit inside of my water filters. I waited for them one day and had them swatted. They got arrested. Their identities were: two crack heads with long felony records. The court (((immediately let them off at their arraingment))), then they and the court tried suing me for illegally recording them inside my own house that they were breaking into.

Anytime I hear a story like yours, where there is so much weird shit going on, I automatically know it’s gangstalking. Try moving out of the US bro. Literally go try egypt or something.

Don’t do this

What's this?

I don't even know if it was the drug but its the only thing that correlates.

It was the drug
A lot of people took either drug multiple times before something broke permanently.
You either didn't search thoroughly or permanent side effects are being censored now
Your doctor will most likely be unaware or lie to you about it.
It's not their life that was ruined, after all

I now get water from a reverse osmosis filter at the store so I doubt it could be tampered with and my food is in packages.

I never let it leave my sight or backpack. What do you think about South East Asia? I'd probably end up there if I had to leave its cheap and a lot speak English.

I would also like to know why this is all happening what have I done that allowed these people to do this. If they simply want to torture me why not just put me in a jail cell at this point

Yeah hoping to reverse it. Apparently its common under the name of PSSD. Post SSRI Syndrome disorder.

Just people with wrecked sex drives and numbness.

For further reference, there are only a few types of drugs known to cause permanent ED in otherwise healthy young men (and some women with sexual stimulation and fertility problems after taking one of the drugs)

SSRIs/SNRIs

Finasteride and DHT blockers

Accutane and toxic doses of other retinoids

Meds used for treating endometriosis and trooning kids

Yeah but how do you reverse it. Am I just a eunuch forever now?

Good luck anon
Mine improved in time but never recovered to anything close to what I was before.
Infertile to boot.

Online people say they recovered with time. Did it really make you infertile?

I can still get erections but its very difficult and I don't have natural desire

Beats me.
Nothing I tried reversed it.
Just got a little better with time to where I could function okay with boner pills in my 20s

I don't see anything horrible on what you wrote, except on the ED.
Get a job. Return to parental home. Find roommates, leave home.
I kind of hate faggots like you. In their early twenties, and complaining about stupid shit. Letting minor stuff rule their lives, and basically giving up in looking for solutions,

We live in a universe that's all the crueler for being so chaotic and unaware of our suffering.

I hate shitskins like you. No kinda about it.

Why don't you just hop on the neetbucks? I'm 37 and have never worked a day in my life. The government gives me free money.
And if you're still taking the antidepressants, just stop. The side effects will go away eventually. If not then get yourself a blood test to check your hormone levels. You can try messing with your hormone levels by taking an AI for a while. Might help, might not.

Yeah I need to get a blood test. I've been off them for a while

Fast water only for 14 days and see how you feel

Sounds like you are on a steady decline.

Did it really make you infertile?

I can't think of any other reason I'd have a low sperm count (verified)

Teenage years: healthy, happy, horny, energetic, imaginative (could visualize a 4k apple spinning), full of cum

After getting wrecked at 18 because of garbage parents sending me to a doctor for being anti-social: Lethargic, think about an-heroing every day, grumpy, not horny, feel sick all the time, unimaginative (can barely render a full apple), dribble cum

lol nice bait

Join a traditional christian church and get your life going again. I recommend Eastern Orthodoxy or Conservative Lutheranism

It's illegal to force or coerce someone into being part of a medical experiment.

flag

It’s America doing all these to you, move to Asia immediately!

It's called bodily autonomy, faggot
HONK HONK!

Become a Texas Ranger.

Did you try getting a hormone panel?

How will that help?

how did putler kill covid?

>Teenage years: healthy, happy, horny, energetic, imaginative (could visualize a 4k apple spinning), full of cum

spunky

could visualize a 4k apple spinning

bull fucking shit

Didn't r3ad, but yes. Anyway to go on with my personal blog I will die alone without siring any children. I hope the world burns.

probably in his mind's eye but maybe he was so full of cum it gave him superpowers

Hormones were in "optimal" ranges in my late 20s and nothing changed.

I mean I tested mine a while ago and it was slightly low around 395 total T and 98 free by the end of the year I will go on TRT as a last resort

It's an aryan superpower that requires youthful vigor
This anon is brown and wouldn't understand it

What keeps you from roping you'll never have a family or much of a life. I can't even gain muscle like I used to

I have a very similar experience :

destroyed skin

social isolation

neet

depressed

It gets worse when I sin but it gets slightly better when I stop. Maybe God will break the curse permanently if I quit sin cold turkey.

I'm not really sure why I keep going anymore.
I really want to see the world burn, but nothing ever happens

I haven't watched porn in 3 months now I'd say no changes maybe slightly better mentally though.

But I still am in some sins mainly my evil thoughts and sloth

Why not just try TRT if you give up it might help?

How regularly do you pray anon ?

I experimented a lot and I noticed that when I quit porn, lust, and start praying more, reading the Bible everyday, these curses start to slowly go away, my skin gets better, depression goes away, isolation is reduced, etc.
However I have never been consistent enough to see how far in the good direction can things go. I often relapse. And it's the only thing that motivates me, the idea that maybe there is an end to the pain if I just do better the next time and not relapse.

When I let myself go, things just get worse in every way. Unforseen problems appear, everything stops working, accidents occur. This pattern of action-reaction has occured with such reliability that I can pretty much predict how tough the times are going to be simply based on my behavior and I'm right 100% of the time.

I've been so angry lately I haven't prayed sincerely much to be honest. I will pray but it feels forced

You don't much of a choice anyway, there aren't 3 thousand ways to address your situation. You have to at least try for a few months and be consistent to see where it leads. What is there else to do ?

fuck america. come live in my spare room

go to hell

I've tried praying before I guess I haven't tried a long fast.

Heck yes. I have failed miserably in every social interaction and every culture change from the early 2000s to mid 2010s only served to make me more ostracized. I hate my incel lonely life

I'm tired of eating and shitting and farting and drinking and washing and grooming myself every day. Just fucking tired of this garbage, I don't even have a family, or woman, or children, or love in my life just sadness and loneliness. This is a flawed creation and experience what the fuck. On top of that I have to go work every day just so I can afford all of the above? Just what the fuck am I doing all that for? Fuck this nigger god and his creation.

Pathetic, both of you. Abrahamism has broken your brains.

There is that too. There is a sense in which we can't really complain until we have exhausted all means available and maybe that's the positive conclusion, the situation is not hopeless.

this

in some sins mainly my evil thoughts and sloth

you have material problems and instead of focusing on your actual problems and your abilities youre talking about sins. this is why Christianity is trash, every pastor will tell you about your sins, no one will see that youre capable, let you stay in the spare room, tell you to do the yard work or whatever. literal boy raper in arizona made it to wisconsin to try to murder kyle rittenhouse because liberals can take care of other liberals

Shut up Poo.

Aside from never having sex, I'm fine

I've tried eating healthy too and that didn't work. My material problems aren't fixed by material things either

started Uni

finish it.

Skin breaks out with horrible acne and hives that haven't gone away to this day I used to have perfect skin now its always bad.

get on Acutane.

All this made me so depressed ended up trying some pharma med gives me permanent ERECTILE DYSFUNCTION to this freaking day. And brain fog/anxiety from not leaving my room has gotten so bad.

Viagra is a thing for a reason, have you tried ceasing the meds causing ED as well?

I would take accutane but it will probably things worse learned my lesson with pharma kikes

let me inject my penis into this situation

very Christlike of you. can Anon Babble start a monastery for Anon Babbleros who need a place to stay and are capable of working or capable of sitting quietly and reading the Bible all day, or is the extent of Anon Babble's Christianity to talk about muh dik

You need to start earning money immediately. Figure the rest out later.

And brain fog/anxiety from not leaving my room has gotten so bad.

Forgot to add, exposure therapy works. Not what you wanted to hear but its true. Put in the effort and this WILL dissipate, I can all but promise you.

Sight, you could have at least presented something worth responding to and not badly regurgitated Gibbons slop historiography.
Muh Rome fell because of Christianity but apparently it sustained well Byzantium for a millenia, the Spanish Empire, the British Empire, the French Empire and two dozen other states for two millenias. And the current Godless West is doing so well now right....oh wait.

I hate you.

It works, and the only side effect ik of is chapped lips. if acne is really messing with your self confidence, to the point you are avoiding going outside and shit, its time to get on it or another similar drug.

I understand why you'd think I am delusional but I've had experiences I do know God is real. He's revealed himself in my life before.

Things are not just random and we are not in a purely material world of energy and atoms.

If you are a young man, there is a 90% chance that you've had or have a problem with porn, it's relevant to talk about it. The OP himself had a problem with it just 3 months ago.

I don't need TRT with TT levels tested from 500-850.
Tested Free T and E2 and they were perfect for my age at the time.
Hormones aren't the problem.
Some people get better but no one can figure out what causes this

I've ceased the drug that I think caused it and I am not on any drugs no changes still have ED. My acne is only slightly better after all these years

Yeah I used to watch it an hour a day. For sure porn is very evil and corrupts you

Well, my condolences that is certainly a very infuriating situation... luckily there are online providers that can prescribe you ED meds and Acne meds. I see ads for them on Hulu all the time I think its like Hims or something?

My anger will never disappear no matter how often I'm exposed to what causes it. That's retarded.

only side effect ik of is chapped lips.

That's if you're lucky
I know of 2 guys with ED from accutane (one of them was an ex of an ex) and knew a girl who puked and shidded blood for a year after she took it.
It was developed as a brain cancer med for fuck's sake.

I'm pretty sure accutane will just fuck me up more. Also I don't want to take viagra my whole life.

No he hasn't, you either misinterpreted a series of events or attached some artificial 'meaning' to the them. If God were real I'd want to crucify him myself, no matter how total his power.

Yeah I am not going to risk it I am already fucked up enough I think if things get worse I'll rope

When I spoke of God I never mentioned Christianity and yet you first attacked that why is that? Why is it that you assumed that's what I meant...

My ancestors never cut each other's dicks or called their elders 'rabbi' like your kike on a stick.

Not advice: I hope it works out for you somehow. Good luck man.

Malice might be aligned with Yeshua's moral philosophy but it isn't with mine, shit skin.

Because this site is full of Christcucks and you mentioned praying.

Yeah they have a christ-like mindset to charity. You're not getting any help unless you're a druggie or felon.

You could try changing your diet and surroundings , nature has healing qualities.

WOAH DUDE

ITS JUST LIKE IN THE LAST OF US

I am at a state park its helping with my mental health at least

you have the heckin mold spores omg its just like the last of us tv show

which your a pedo if you complain about btw chud

THE LAST OF US

Never watched it is it any good? I'll look up a summary

Your fellow citizens are mutilating their children's genitals right now as we speak. It's called a sex change surgery and it's extremly popular, specially amongst the demographic that rejects the '' kike on a stick ''. Seems like you need some Abrahamic help after all.

DUDE DUDE DUDE

so the MOLD SPORES in the show are actually an EVIL HIVE MIND and it turns them into zombies. ITS LITERALLY THE LAST OF US AND ITS MAKING YOU A CHUD ZOMBIE

Yeah I am not going to risk it

Good.
Just try to take care of your health and see what happens in the next few years
Never trust pharma and never forget their raison d'être is to provide profit to shareholders.
Any pilpul about helping people is toward that end.

That would be pretty funny if thats why my skin is so messed up

Does it ever feel like reality is punishing you? Or like you are cursed?

Yes. I think I did something horrible in a previous life to deserve the life I live now. Karma. I will have paid of the karmic debt eventually. If humans are just intelligent apes competing for resources on a small water covered rock somewhere within a incomprehensibly vast space without objective moral force rewarding or punishing our behaviour — what do you really have to fear? Life is so fucking short. All the sensations you experience will be forgotten. Whatever. I like to think, no matter who you are, if you have a soul your decisions matter. That's how I cope. Maybe I'm spot on. Maybe I'm wrong. So be it.

I think the past life part is a cope for death. All is true, except there was no past, and there will be no future. Abysmally forgotten.

Yeah Covid should have been enough to redpill me but this fully redpilled me I am afraid to ever see a doctor again.

>All this made me so depressed ended up trying some pharma med gives me permanent ERECTILE DYSFUNCTION to this freaking day

ED isn't even so bad at this point. What's the point in cooming when the women and life we're forced into are complete fake shit?

Hell is too good for them. Don't worry though all these lying creatures are going to get completely butt fucked to death by their masters.

porno isnt the cause, loneliness is. people who arent alone arent whacking off

How would you know what happens after death and before birth?

Being a eunuch is pretty awful anon. Even if I never wanted a woman sexual energy is a vital force that drives all men

When all we had was stones and mud huts humans still did the same evil garbage. Just look at Africa. Blaming tech is midwit cope and the guy you posted was a failed autistic troon.

Because I can tell you now, nothing happened before. You cannot remember a past life you are coping.

I came into this world deformed. Believe me, I understand that feel.

It's not sex energy that's so important but that's what it usually ends up being converted to so men could be manipulated using their dicks. Actual eunuchs live more than a decade longer than normal men. Sex drive is a scam like most of this life.

What's wrong with you anon?

You choose what you use it for. You are right though most men use it to be porn watching bottom feeders. But its also been used to change the world. Men worked hard to get money and resources so they could have a wife. Sex drive is one of the big energies in man if you take it away you get rid of quite a bit of the drive factor in us.

I now get water from a reverse osmosis filter at the store so I doubt it could be tampered with and my food is in packages.

I never let it leave my sight or backpack.

Alright be careful

What do you think about South East Asia? I'd probably end up there if I had to leave its cheap and a lot speak English.

It’s the default place for guys to run off to. So yeah Its a good place to go but I do notice that it’s getting swarmed by israelis. My guess is that they are being sent there on purpose by israel specifically to find and locate targets who run away to those countries. They are doing the same thing with any country right now that is easy or a good place for dudes to run to. All the israelis live there they arent tourists, thats the first thing that should clue you in, so beware.

I would also like to know why this is all happening what have I done that allowed these people to do this.

It’s almost always that some kike you personally knew at some point in your life has a vendetta against you, it’s that simple. Maybe you said the wrong thing around him/her. Maybe he just disliked you a lot. It could have been someone you met 20 years ago. Thats how those people are. Maybe it’s an antifa. They are both really similar. If I had to guess that would be my best bet since you post here

If they simply want to torture me why not just put me in a jail cell at this point

Same reason they didnt take me to court until they had it in evidence that I had recorded them. They either lack the pretext for the corrupt court to run with yet. Or worse. They simply want to kill you.

For the record these people hold grudges for decades over nothing. There is an italian leftist I met in 2018, never seem him somce 2018, who to this day still crawls through my followers lists on socials and spams everybody with copypastas about me being a fascist. These people arent like you and me they aint normal.

dont take the vax, go eat some natto with rice and egg to fix your brainfog issue then exercise to get your stamina back, then life will start getting better, also sleep properly. sleep is important to heal from the shedding neurotoxin exposure all niggers spread

Fyi they could have put aomething in your water or food that fucked your hypothalmus-pituitary system, thats what happened to me. I lost 40 lbs of muscle and stopped looking like myself, deapite comtinuing to lift, straight up people thought I contracted AIDS.

fellow citizens

Lmao. And no, Semitic lies and bullshit only hurt whites in the long term.

Just because you can't remember it does not mean it didn't happen. This argument does prove anything.

Dont go on TRT. What is your LH and FSH

does not prove anything*
ffs

I can do this but the apple keeps transforming into a red bell pepper. Why?

Yes.

No clue all I know is total T levels were 400 and free T was 98.

Need to get a better blood test I will when I can in a month or 2

why natto?

Yeah they work to get a wife that 99.9 percent of the time got ran through by other men before during or after the marriage. A wife who's only around to control behavior and extract money she'll spend poorly in exchange for sad rare sex and "love" on behalf of their rich faggot masters in government who groomed them to be this way. What men are changing the world in any worth a shit way with muh sex energy? If anything they're all maintaining the garbage. To threaten any healthy changes would risk losing the whores they were told were so special/valuable/loving. It's obviously bullshit.

Yeah dont hop on Any T unless you check your full panel. T can fuck you up but LH and FSH doesnt hurt you long term if you boost that if you’re short on it. Like I said T is only LAST resort for many reasons

Trust me I beat this shit

There are bright sides to it. Directly because of these people, I own no home; I have no friends; I have no family; nothing feels familiar or welcoming anywhere I go; I have been thrown away like garbage and treated worse. The bright side is, I have nothing to lose. People already think the worst of me. I have zero chance of my prospects changing (if things stay they way they are). My past, present and future has been stripped from me. And so, it offers a certain freedom, I suppose. You don’t have to care about anything. Nothing matters. They’re going to hate you and try to destroy you no matter what. It honestly doesn’t matter what you do or how much you yield. They will always hate you. It doesn’t matter if you’re a kind and gracious person. They’re going to hate you. It does help in some way having that sort of certainty. You come to realize that the whole point is to have an excuse to abuse you. That’s why the goalposts keep moving. It’s just a game to have some seemingly plausible basis for bullying others.
So, we have to stand up. These are truly evil people. Be glad you were born in a time that gave you a worthy cause to invest yourself into.

Bro what do you think about karma?
Have you read my posts?

You need the energy that comes with sex and testosterone to fight, especially to the death.

How does one boost LH or FSH? Also its cause I am desperate to be like a normal man again.

* "sex energy"

I think its more then likely demons mess with certain people. I've seen the nicest people in the world with horrible issues. If they truly had an evil soul they certainly don't seem to.

Sometimes good looking people are quite evil too. This also applies in the opposite as well. For my case though the reason it seems like a curse is because it happened all at once. I think its likely some demon messing with me or a curse

I gotta say you didn't research the drugs you were taking and you just looked for an easy way out. If they gave you ED. The only thing you can do now is fight for your life and be better. Research doesn't take long and even living on a car in a state park is better than living on the streets panhandling. You at least not a complete loser.

Get a min wage job and invest all the money into btc

Not really when humans kill animals with more test than them all the time. Even a child could kill some roided freak. If you're in a life or death situation (which you probably won't be anyway) the right knowledge, tools and enough anger will help kill the threat just fine.

You need to believe in 'balance' or a 'just world' so you bought into the lie of karma. That's what I think. Entropy wins. Entropy always wins.

I still don't get why they haven't locked me up. The government could easily find some excuse to throw most people here in prison. So why haven't they done it yet.

My guess is my tormentor isn't human but a demon(s)

It feels like the universe is punishing me and every step I take, it's there to make sure I cannot catch a break from anything.
Yeah I'd say it also started around 21 and the funny thing is.. I don't know what I did wrong or why I'm punished so viscously now. I just know it's happening, every day now.
If you knew why you're being punished, it would be easier to feel regret but no, it just started and continues

Naturally? Diet, sleep, excercise, relaxation. You’ll find it hard to truly relax where you currently are since the stalkers specifically want to stop you from doing that. For the other 3 things start today. You need some sunlight too. Some. LH is the precursor chemical to all the different androgens. A doctor can also easily help you with it whether its naturally or by chem remedy or both. If I were you I would go to the doc in Thailand they are really fuckin good.

Already have like 5 grand in it from way back when it was cheaper not planning on selling it yet

Nah it’s always other people doing this kind of stuff to them. Maybe there is a philosophical argument for WHY they do this. Are jews actually possessed? Who knows. Dont bother yourself with why, just understand that they are predators and that they are hunting you.

We're both speculating. Are you familiar with Pascal's wager?

it breaks apart the myalin proteins that grow in everyones body after getting exposed to the mRNA shedding that vaccinated people unintentionally spread through sweat and dead skin cells, Natto contains an enzyme as well as vitamin K2 that breaks up the prion-like protein that causes brainfog in people recently. so it helps your body flush it out through the urine and shit basically. the prion clots are usually blood colored and sometimes beige white fat protein mixed

Dueteronomy 28
Learn from it
Skydaddys punishment will continue until morality improves

Par for the course leafpost.

The government could easily find some excuse to throw most people here in prison.

If you’ve fedposted then sure. If not then no they have a much harder time finding that pretext. Also gangstalking is done by very local governments by the most part, although they are helped by other corrupt local govs in other parts of the country. Look into the fresno gangstalking case.

demons

Maybe your stalkers are possessed. Maybe they worship satan. Who knows, you dont need to care about this it’s irrelevant to the problem or to the outcome. Focus on what they are doing physically, roght here right now. Thats how you best them and dont drive yourself up the wall overthinking this problem.

Pascals Wager is the biggest pile of bullshit, there are so many different belief systems and gods. Midwittery.

I think it may be demons because they know certain things about me I've only thought in my mind. It also seems like I am being messed with in ways only I could know.

You might have mumbled that stuff to yourself outloud in front of a hidden cam one afternoon 2 years ago and didnt realize/dont remember. Nothing you wrote sounds beyond the scope of the stalkers I dealt with.

Something similar happened to me. I think God cursed me for not praising him constantly after being protected by him during covid

I think its very likely anyone on this site could have a manufactured reason to be thrown away for at least a year. A friend of mine was thrown in a psych ward for very minor posts that are made on /pol everyday. Because he "could be a threat". The only reason we aren't locked up is because they don't care enough to do so.

So you're a moral nihilist?

So do I have to make it myself or is there a magical one already made that I can buy? Swedish sites are okay too even if you don't want to link them, least name them

I'm a pissed off white nationalist who doesn't see any realistic solutions, I can't believe in anything magic, supernatural or 'spiritual'. The universe is cruel and everything only wants to eat and fuck, that's what I see. What I think and feel doesn't matter, that's what I see.

Why do you believe in reincarnation ?

I'll try to get some natto not sure where to look. But its funny I just read about it for its K2 properties today what a weird synchronicity...

you can basically find natto at asian import stores, then you keep it frozen, you take some beans that you like and leave them in water (basedbeans, kidney beans or whatever type you like) then after 24 hours you drain the water and pressure cook them for 8 minutes suspended and let it cool down, then you move them over to a sterile container (pour boiling water on container beforehand to sterilize) after beans are luke warm, you cut a dice of frozen natto and drop into the batch of beans, mix it around with a clean spoon so the natto spores go everywhere then you put a plastic foil over it, puncture holes and move it to the beans surface then you repeat another layer of foil but keep it at the top to add an airpocket, you .... actually .. you can just check youtube for this, youtube "natto dad" and theres a guide ... but basically.. you leave it for another 24 hours at around 30 celcius ~ and the beans become natto beans

tldr: youtube "natto dad" and you have good guides, natto can be eaten in smaller amounts mixed with rice and egg and other dishes to make it easier to eat

series of bad things happened in my life between late 2023-late 2024. two things were mostly my fault although I don't feel conviction for anything I do. just careless decisions made with minimal thinking. I also have been getting moderate acne nonstop for almost 2 years and my skin used to be completely normal. it doesn't scar though and most of it isn't on my face.

It explains inequality, why we are born into better or worse circumstance.

You're analysing your past to justify the present, but the core issue are not these minor events that happened in your life.
All the problems that you presented are fixable but you're probably depressed to even try to fix

My advice is to take ayahuasca or micro dosis of shrooms, this will help resetting your neural paths and help with depression, but be aware that if you are prone to schizophrenia and do psychedelics you can develop the disease, but it's a bet worth to try

I'll see if our Asian store has it as we only have one.
I did try to buy "freezedried" ones from drakfrukt but I knew they weren't gonna be the same and they weren't I take it as I've heard they're a unique taste but these had no real taste so.
Thanks, I'll have to look into it as it would be nice to find whatever way to get my life back after everyone at work started shedding on me, I was most likely the only one that stayed away from that poison cocktail

Grass fed butter or fermented dairy are another great source of K2.

Take peganum harmala. Were you prescribed a RIMA, you could've made pharmahuasca and transcend your inadequacies.

It's sort of a last resort thing since it can be mixed bag. I also believe these drugs can open yourself up to demonic entities I'd be careful

Malformation of the bladder and urethra requiring at least 6 surgeries before I was 10 to reconstruct, including a ledbetter-deebs (one of the most painful urinary tract procedures out there).

My life started downhill and it hasnt much improved in 49 years. But it does give me an excuse, so there's that.

freezedried can work, but they have a shelf life like bread yeast. i once bought from china and it expired the next year but it got me a good starter batch that i could freeze in and repeat multiply!

the natto has a mushroom nutty flavor, tastes kinda like peanut almost but people are mostly bothered by the texture of it, so therefore you can mix it with mustard or spices to experiment with flavors!, i'll go photo the natto i made earlier today

I'll probably have scars on my forehead for years and years. the rest of my face isn't as bad but my forehead is the worse I might just grow my hair out to cover it

Process relational panentheism defeats these false dichotomies by acknowledging all gods are one.

Yeah that's pretty bad. At least you're 49 it'll be all over soon. You don't have much more to go another 30 years at most but that's unlikely even

Why is an 'explanation' necessary? Who owes you one?

Coping does indeed turn most men into a happy little Sisyphus.

This idea that we are given only one life by a righteous force or god (whatever you want to call it) does not logically appeal to me. How can god be just by sending you to hell permanently for your temporary behaviour? That sounds too bad to be true because it's disproportional. How can you be permanently rewarded by coming to heaven for your temporary behaviour? Sounds too good to be true.

I think it's just different soul's experience the human condition in different ways.

Also if you truly believe the words of Christianity its a blessing to be disadvantaged its much easier to be close to God that way. It also is the free will of evil parents to ruin their kids through bad diet inbreeding and other bad practices. The bible even says certain races of people are cursed and so are their children

If reincarnation is real who has sanctioned these souls to keep coming back? Also what of the fluctuating population sizes there are 8X more humans today then 700 years ago so are new souls created?

About 4 years ago I really noticed my health deteriorating. Listen up kids, seriously, take as much care of your body while you're young so it's not so darn hard when you're my age. I'm in shape but fucking he'll does it take a lot to stay that way, and it only gets worse from here.

I have been debating a lot whether I'll see 60. It's 11 years away but there's not a lot of motivation and that still seems like a long time considering some recent health problems.

I won't miss it.

pharmahuasca

Whats a RIMA and pharmahuasca ?

here is some pictures of a frozen box from asian import, and the batch i made earlier today, its been in the fridge so its color are a bit darker. phone camera is also shit so i quickly cropped some crap picture for show

Yeah

try to get GF

no luck

try to get job

no luck

do training to get job

still no luck

just constant failures, cockblocks and no replies. Guess I'll just play vidya games then.

if the natto has those white halo's at the bottom of the glass container it means its a success and should be ready to eat!

Do you have any kids?

I'm just describing a righteous reality. You're free to do whatever you are capable of, but I recommend doing what you should.

By the laws of reciprocity despair shall find you

Let me reiterate: It JUSTIFIES inequality.

indeed, dairy is great. but they tried to poison all dairy products with some mRNA poison called "Bovaer" a few months ago, so it has been hit or miss with dairy products. gotta beware what the food industry are up to, their main interest is that we all die afterall. (to "save" the climate, we are the co2 they want to remove lol)

10 years ago i got out of prison with 23 USD in my pocket.
No place to live and no friends left as they where all junkies like me so i had to move on.
No family as they where fed up with me years before.
So there i was, drug free after using since i was 12 with my new found freedom, and still felt worse than i ever had.
I realised i only had two choices, go back to what i knew or do the complete opposite.
I chose the opposite and did absolutely everything for the first year completely opposite of what i had done before.
Today i live in fixer upper in a nice neighborhood, have repaid all of my debts, have a bit of savings and the other day i got two phone calls.
One was being asked to tell my story to the 6`th graders at my local school and the other was my brother that i had not heard from in many, many years.
It sounds cringe af, but there is always a way.
Sometime we just have to look a little harder for it.

I wish you the very best.

sorry that's the wrong word
I think you know what I mean

How did you not get a piece of paper to show them that you were in fact vaccinated? Lol it’s called forgery, it’s very easy.

You love your hell and you love suffering otherwise you would want to overcome

Not only does it explain inequality, it justifies it.
That's what I mean, to be clear.

What did he say specifically? Ive seen cops have to try to dig in order to actually use the mental ward loophole.

Your problem is that you aren’t living life, or facing any challenges. You have just been living in your parent’s house until very recently. And now the they kicked you out, you’re just hanging out in your car, doing nothing. You have to make a move man… You can’t just keep passively sitting around and wondering why your life seems like a dead end.

Just make some basic decision and follow through with it. Go get a job at Home Depot or Costco. At least establish some income.

Can you answer this guy

I don't know. Why does it have to be a "someone" judging us? Could it not just be a law? And regarding the fluctuating population I think it's possible that they come from other planes of existence.

Enlist in the Army, you moron.

try tetracycline for a month for your skin acne
it will work

Post acne with time stamp or you're just larping. OP is trying to scare people

Are you kidding? Even if I could (I can't) I would willingly choose not to bring them here. This is a bad place. Worse yet, as fucked as my life has been there are people WORSE off than any of us who didn't deserve it. I've met some.

Children are a leap of faith blessed only to the elect of this world, and I am definitely not among them.

These are demons

Yeah hoping to reverse it. Apparently its common under the name of PSSD.

Yes, you actively sterilized yourself.

What's your argument against karma?

What men are changing the world in any worth a shit way with muh sex energy? If anything they're all maintaining the garbage. To threaten any healthy changes would risk losing the whores they were told were so special/valuable/loving.

factual

Indian pagan bullshit

I meant they didn't make it policy until the end of the semester

Did you try lying to them or falsify a vaccination card? Do you consume marjiuana? If you do, stop immediately. Against brain fog, I would recommend an acetylcholine supplement. You can combine that with aniracetam, it improves verbal performance for me. Both are available over the counter in America.

Three months. That's all it took to unravel everything I had built.

I used to have everything—stability, love, a future. My job was my pride. I was climbing the ladder, respected by my peers, loved by my family. But everything changed so quickly.

It started with a meeting at work. They told me my position was being “restructured.” No fire, no warning—just a polite severance, like I was disposable. I was devastated, but I told myself I could handle it. It wasn’t the end of the world, right? But with every passing day, the reality sank in. I wasn’t just without a job. I was without a purpose.

I came home, and my wife noticed. She always noticed. She asked how my day had been, and I said the usual, not wanting to burden her with my failure. But the distance between us grew. She didn’t understand. How could she? I couldn’t even understand it myself.

Then, the health issues started. The stress from work, from everything, was eating away at me. My chest tightened one night. I thought it was nothing, but a trip to the doctor confirmed it—a heart attack. Stress-induced, he said. That was the wake-up call I needed. But by then, it was already too late. I was unraveling faster than I could keep up with.

My wife stayed with me for a while, but it didn’t last. How could she stay with someone who had nothing left to give? She left, quietly. I didn’t stop her. I didn’t fight for anything anymore.

Now, I’m here, alone. I don’t know how to keep going, but I’m still here. Every day is a reminder of everything I lost.

Three months. That’s all it took to destroy me.

Thanks for the story chatgpt

I got more, three more to be specific he hasn't posted a picture with timestamp

It all started when I got redpilled.

This is why it's all made up

I never thought time could move so fast and still leave you feeling like you’ve been standing still. Three months ago, I was just a regular person, living my life, thinking I had more time, more of everything. Now, I’m left with nothing.

The beginning of the end was subtle. First, I lost my job. They said it was due to "company restructuring," but what they really meant was they didn’t need me anymore. I wasn’t young enough, hungry enough, smart enough. They just moved on without me.

I came home that night, trying to keep my composure. My partner didn’t know yet. I didn’t know how to say the words. I had no answers. The silence between us grew every day after that, as I sank further into this dark hole. I didn’t know how to get out, and I didn’t care to.

I started isolating myself. I couldn’t face the world, couldn’t face anyone. Every morning felt like a battle to just get out of bed. And then, my health started to suffer. I couldn’t sleep, couldn’t eat. My chest hurt. I couldn’t breathe. I had a panic attack in the middle of the night, and I thought I was going to die.

The hospital visit confirmed it. The doctor said my body was failing under the weight of stress. But I didn’t care. I was too far gone.

My partner, who had stayed by me through the worst, couldn’t take it anymore. They left. It wasn’t a fight, wasn’t a grand moment. They just packed their things quietly. And I let them go. What else could I do?

Now, three months later, I sit in this house, alone. I’ve lost everything. My job, my health, my love. I don’t know where to go from here. I don’t know if I can keep going.

You might be on to something

Kek!

How'd you know it's chat gpt?

It's not that hard to notice unnatural directions in stories or speech patterns. Plus the syntax was pretty decent for a Pajeet flag.

man has conflated sin with wickedness and virtue with righteousness, when one is not possible without the other; one must destroy to create, and one may create to destroy, and one's virtuous actions may beget wickedness and one's sinful actions may beget righteousness, while balance creates harmony

Can you mentally bite that apple and taste its sweet, yet firm flesh and all the juciness it has to provide?

It's an honor to be an enemy to so many subhumans

Your environment can affect your hormones. So maybe. Epigenetics. Go get HRT

Look man, pol...there's a lot of good people here, but make sure you filter out the ones making funnies. And it is funny, so roll with it.

Now, the problems you describe, yeah they suck and they came one after another. It happens. But as manybothers have said, you gotta get yourself moving, this tech world, which uncle Ted warned about, is getting many down. You can't just give up tho.

A few steps to take:
1. Mold at uni - find a good attorney and they'd probably take it in pro Bono. Sue the fuck out of them.
2. The friends, fuck it, you'll get new ones. If they left you out to dry, they weren't good anyways. If you do have one, ask them for help.
3. Find some sort of work that is meaningful to you. I highly suggest something physical. In your situation, you could find a farmer that will let you camp out in exchange for your labor.
4. Improve your diet, get exercise. No. 3 above provides that for you free of charge. No need to join a gay gym.
5. Get off the drugs. They do more harm then good. Yes it will suck for a week or so and then might drag for much longer. Sunshine literally helps with that, not a joke.
6. Finish college if you want to. You can use the college jew loans to at least get a roof over your head and food in your belly.
7. Do not worry about what others think of you. You are good to go, just improve yourself a little at a time. Anyone judging you is a pile of shit. I recommend getting away from cities to avoid that shit. Plenty of manual labor help needed in the sticks. Healthier living too.
The devil will give you want you want. Christ gives you what you need.

That skin cancer's a bitch once they start popping up, hope yours are all the benign sort, try vitamin b5 daily if you don't already, can help your skin fight back a little.