You incel fascist LARPers on Anon Babble thought this was all just some 5D chess game, huh? Oh Trump’s bringing back jobs! MAGA baby! NO. HE’S BRINGING BACK THE DARK AGES.
The orange freak: Cheeto Nero, Blimpel Stiltskins, nuclear narcissist in chief signed an executive order that tariffs every single foreign import. EVERYTHING. Not just China. Not just "strategic" goods. EVERYTHING. It’s over. It’s genuinely, actually OVER.
You cheered as he slapped tariffs on literally everything not nailed down; do you even understand how a global supply chain works? No? Didn't think so.
Trump will burn the world down before he lets anyone else take the wheel. If he gets deposed, by Congress, by the military, whatever; he’s not going to shuffle offstage like Nixon. No, he’ll scream about treason, he’ll call his followers to arms, he’ll go on Truth Social and tell them to rise up, and they'll KILL. They’ll storm capitals. They’ll attack cities. They’ll start setting off bombs in the name of the flag. And when it becomes clear that even that won’t save him?
He’ll push the button.
I’m not saying that metaphorically. I mean it. He will see himself losing, and in that final, fevered moment of ego and rage and apocalyptic narcissism, he will reach for the nuclear football and end the world. He will do it. He will nuke the planet because if he can’t be king, no one gets to live.
I’m fleeing. I’m not even joking. My flight is tomorrow. I'm headed to Iceland or... I don't even know anymore. Somewhere away the equator with no fascists. Somewhere that won’t be a nuclear crater in a week.
Xi Jinping and the CCP won. Not because they invaded. Not because they hacked us. But because we imploded. Because we let a reality TV lunatic destroy us from the inside, and we laughed, and memed, and shrugged, and now here we are; one step away from nuclear winter.
I don’t know if I’ll see tomorrow. I don’t know if any of us will. I might kill myself if I can't catch a flight tomorrow.
This is it.